InsaneJournal

It was a little-known fact, but under the stern, staunch robes was a wonderland of androgyny. Snape hadn't worn greying underpants for a while. He'd made a more worthwhile acquaintance: silky women's knickers.

There were two reasons as to why he had been so angry with Neville for imagining a boggart image of him in a hat with a vulture and a ridiculous red handbag and an ugly dress. He didn't want people to know he loved dressing in feminine things of course (not that feminine really applied to a hat with a stuffed vulture on top), but even more importantly he didn't want people thinking he was a tacky dresser.

His dark little secret, his lingerie, was lacy and silky and made him look great. At least he thought so. It was hard to lose too much control over his temper when he felt so sinfully luxurious. Today he was even wearing stockings inside his seemingly-masculine boots.

The students that he terrified would have a field day if they knew, not to mention what some of the other Death Eaters would say. Although, he wondered how well he could still intimidate—it would even help him out if they figured he was simply going mad.

He'd taken from Narcissa, that first time, and now it was both habit and obsession. He had known she was going to realize the missing pieces of underclothing, dispensable as they were (dispensable to her, though in reality they were expensive). It wasn't like Narcissa not to notice. Narcissa pretended she was none the wiser, though she and Snape both knew better. But she kind of thought it was sweet. Perhaps she'd bring it up someday, that should prove interesting. She wanted to hear the secretive, conservative man's reaction.

Wasn't his birthday coming up? For the first time, she had the sudden urge to buy him a gift. After all, if he was stealing her clothes, she already knew his size.